(no subject)

[quidditchgrrl]

*examines belly button*

I have made a decision on something that's been at the back of my mind for a while now.

Or, more precisely, hanging off the front of me.  I'm going to get a tummy tuck.

I am so sick of looking like shit in all of my clothes, working out 10-12 hours a week and still watching skin bouncing around in the mirror with every move I make.  My abdominal muscles are extremely strong, and I actually have contour, but you would never be able to tell by looking at me.  It's disheartening to be able to run 10 miles, but look as though I never get off the couch.

Right now, I look like that most despised of women, the girl who has Let Herself Go.  I'd like the opportunity to look normal, for the first time in my life.

It's been a bit of a depressing process, most especially since my doctor seems to think that simply losing more weight would take care of the problem, when in actuality, my losing more weight has made the ugliness even more noticable. (My surgical scar is vertical, and my stomach curves inward toward that midline.  Gross.)

Once I've got the money, it's going to happen, to save my mental health.  I hate that I can't be happy with what I have, to feel lucky and grateful that I'm alive/healthy, and I hate that I feel worse now - mentally - than I ever did when I was obese. 

Anyway, that's my story and I'm sticking to it.

*returns to contemplating navel*

Comments

[megome.livejournal.com]

absolutely! it is going to make you feel happy/better. after i had my breast reduction, my self-esteem skyrocketed, and i felt like people would be able to see me, and not a small girl with huge boobs. five years later, it was like, one of the best decisions i (or my back) had ever made.

you'll thank yourself, too!! GOOD LUCK!! :)

[quidditchgrrl.livejournal.com]

Good to know it went well for you!

Thanks!

[hermorrine.livejournal.com]

I TOTALLY hear you. Eventually, I'm going to have to suck it up and work on having plastics done. I want to have three areas done, tummy being one of them. I'm surprised that it doesn't look worse than it does, but I still really don't like it.

I hope it'll go well for you!

[quidditchgrrl.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

I think that it has a lot to do with having a sense of completion about the whole thing - I am reminded of being sick, not only when I see my scar, but every time I move. Boo.

[blackdracaena.livejournal.com]

I say "Go for it", if I had the money I would long have had a breast reduction, I want to be able to sleep on my tummy again. No matter how much weight I lose my breasts stay the same.

[qwyneth.livejournal.com]

I don't know what your insurance situation is like, but I had a breast reduction and it was completely covered by insurance. You might want to look into it.

[quidditchgrrl.livejournal.com]

Mine were the first things to lose weight! :|

It's weird to have a place that just won't.go.away no matter what you do. I hope you can find a way to have a reduction before you end up with health problems.

[qwyneth.livejournal.com]

Congratulations on making the decision! I hope it goes well and you are happy with the results. My mental health was extremely improved by my breast reduction--I hope your tummy tuck does the same. :)

[amanderpanderer.livejournal.com]

You do what you need to do...and sux to the haters.

[nuclearpolymer.livejournal.com]

My best friend from school lost about 100 lbs, and then had some plastic surgery to deal with saggy skin. It wasn't fun, but she loved the results. Good luck and I think it's great that you've decided to do what you want to do.

[quidditchgrrl.livejournal.com]

Thanks! :)

[harpinred.livejournal.com]

I totally support you on your quest to feel better about yourself! Just research your surgeons and make sure you get somebody who is Plastic Surgery Board certified and that comes highly recommended.

I had re-constructive surgery after having a mass removed from my left breast. It was benign, thank goodness, but I was very uneven. Six years later, I had a breast augmentation to both (because according to my doctor, I had the shoulders for a D cup ;) And while I don't exactly look like a pin-up, I'm happy with the results. And hey, I'm 40 and perky! :D

I think that as long as you go in with reasonable expectations, that you'll be very happy. And don't let people discourage you if this is what you really want. You're doing it for you, not anybody else :)

(((HUGS)))

[quidditchgrrl.livejournal.com]

Thanks! I've been researching doctors here - OSU does a lot of post-gastric bypass reconstruction - and I'm going to take my time and find a qualified surgeon that I'm comfortable with.

Reasonable for me would mean just making the two blobs on either side of my midline go away! I don't need to look like a supermodel, just being able to buy jeans in the right size will do. :)

[poconell.livejournal.com]

Good for you! Why shouldn't you do something just for yourself? Whose body is it anyway?

Congratulations!

And thanks for the nudge. I'm not ignoring it, I'll post something today!

[quidditchgrrl.livejournal.com]

Thanks! Hope you've been doing well. :)

[alissomora.livejournal.com]

Good on you - if it will make you happier, then you should do it. It's something I worry about, too. *hugs*

[quidditchgrrl.livejournal.com]

My loose skin came about when I was sick - I lost 20# in less than a month.

Hopefully, since you're losing weight sensibly, your skin should come back evenly! Good luck! :)