quidditchgrrl: (Fuck Off)
First, ILU guys, you make me feel like a million bucks!  *smooches*

Second, I'm spending most of my online time working on job hunting.  Actually, all of my time.

Third, I totally get what you said about breaking up with your job, [livejournal.com profile] mostcurious.  I'm so done.  Just, done.  I have to go to work and smile and pretend that nothing is wrong, when all I want to do is cry and rage and spit.

This is kind of stuff I'm dealing with )

I just want out.  I applied for 54 jobs yesterday, 19 today.  I'll be sending paper resumes out tomorrow for another.  Please please please let me get what I want...I hate feeling like I'm never going to find that elusive "good fit" job, or that I'll keep running into the 3-year blahs.

My current song just came on, and...*orders Girls Just Want to Have Fun from Amazon*

Aaaaah - I hate feeling this this.  Bleh!  I want to feel good again!  I want to run because I want to, not just to stay sane.  Maybe I should start marathon training *dies laughing*

Oh, I know nearly everyone is super-into Twilight, but I tried again this weekend and...nothing.  Not even RPatt as...the dude...could get me interested.  Sigh.  Sometimes, I wish I had enough of an attention span to concentrate on fads, TV shows and stuff!  But then I remember, there's always US Weekly and People.  And Harry Potter.  :-)

One of these days I'll post a light-hearted, happy entry.  Hopefully one that details my new job!

<3 to you all, because reading LJ is something good I can do every day.
quidditchgrrl: (angst angst angst)
You know, until a few minutes ago, I'd never heard Jonathan Rhys-Meyers sing.

I think...I need some new undies. Holy hell. Just another layer of teh pretty.

Here's the song, from August Rush - This Time.

Also, this fic, by Anonymous, fucking OWNS me. I nearly melted into a puddle, and right before work, too. Paging Dr. Freud, STAT.

Luckily, there was some eye candy at work in the form of a couple cutie-pie patrons and one co-worker. It's at times like this that I really hate being married, I can't get no satisfaction. Promises, promises. Hormonal angst ahead. )

*wades out of the angst pool*

Heh, check out Gingerbread Ghetto. That's the kind of holiday craft I can get behind!

Other than that...I got nothing but a whole lot of energy going to waste. :-P
quidditchgrrl: (Deal with it!)
This weekend has been equal parts great and notso.

I had to pay the piper for not doing this month's deep-clean in stages at the Temple (spot vacuuming!  leather cleaning!  high dusting!), but the place looks great.  This gig is turning out to be a great one.

I've spent a fair bit of time castigating myself about work.  Until tonight, I didn't realize that I'd interviewed for the CML job in the early spring.  I should have been looking to improve at least six months before that.  Why?  Complacence?  Ego?  Sheer dumbassery?  I dunno.

Work Saturday sucked.  So busy, short-staffed.  I left for lunch and the place quite literally fell apart.  Add that to feeling no one likes me at all (which the LM has stated is the case - why I listen to her, I don't know, but the insinuation hurts even if it isn't 100% true - perception is everything), and you get a person who is constantly anxious and marginalized.

Probably not the best time to start listening to Primal Leadership and having Daniel Goleman enumerate the various ways I fail at effective leadership.

BUT, all is not lost.  Please to be directing your positive thoughts to my job search - I applied for a job at the Ohio Board of Regents, one at Ohio State, and one at Battelle King Ave.  Tomorrow I'll call my former boss at Battelle West Jeff and see if she'd be willing to say nice things about me (which might be a stretch, all things considered, but I'm not going to beat myself up over things in the past that I can't change).

I went to lunch at North Market and chilled today.  The Pad Thai from China Market has healing properties.  :-9  I'm inclined to believe that even if I'm jumping ship late, I can still make it out alive. Somewhere there is a headboard to float on in the frigid seas (/bad Titanic reference)!

Tomorrow I'm driving down to Roundtown to the dentist - I have a tooth (one that I had a root canal on) that is scary black under the crown.  Meeble.

Hope you all had a great weekend!

quidditchgrrl: (Deal with it!)

Surfing Fark provides all the amusement one needs on a Saturday night.

Well, all the amusement a person not able to drink can have.

Ten verses never preached on If only the Sunday school teacher had mentioned these, I might have been a believer.  Or not.

The top 15 strangest coincidences.  As someone who experiences a lot of deja vu and coincidence, this is kind of cool.  I believe in the attraction of people and fate.

Anyone else think that Time's
Person of the Year is super-lame?  Way to cop out, Time-Warner.  We all know it should have been Stephen Colbert!  But he just mattered.

Today I got a Holiday card from someone I am most CERTAINLY not friends with, nor will I ever be friendly with again.  It was like looking at a scar - you see the mark, but it doesn't feel like it happened to you, really. 

Here are the
Top 50 Singles of 2006.  I'd say 99% of them are puke-worthy.  Though I do dig Gnarls Barkley and I love me some JT.  Shut up.

Ahahaha!  That Laffy Taffy song is on the list!  Can anyone tell me what the hell they mean by that?  I love misogynistic rap music as much as the next 'ho (as my addiction for David Banner's
"Play" shows), but even I couldn't make that out.

I had a massage Friday - painful!  Even my facial muscles were sore; how is that possible?!  But I'm not sore at all today.  I could get used to that.

I'm tired.

Hope you're having a good weekend!
quidditchgrrl: (PMS emergency)
Before teh emo: Happy birthday, [livejournal.com profile] snoopypez! :)

I think, rather than being depressed, I'm just suffering from a change in the way my body manifests PMS.

Because I was okay for the past couple of weeks, and now I want to curl up into a ball and moan for a week or so.

Work: position descriptions are changing, which means a new job title for me. It might be more money, and more variety of positions supervised, but probably the end of professional development. Sigh. Time to start looking for a new job Y/N?

We hit a million check-outs about 6:45 tonight, three weeks earlier than last year. 125% increase in circulation since 1995 (meaning the annual circ is 125% of what it was in 1995) with ZERO increase in staff. Hey, who cares if the staff is hollow-eyed automatons? Smile, dammit!

New second job/position is going well. Place is filthy, but everyone seems patient. Building-wide cleaning is Saturday, and after that I'll have a better idea of where to start the deep clean. The people who were cleaning before me cleaned out the place; they even took a measurement/substitution card from the kitchen. Strange.

Why do people write insincere thank you notes? I got a thank-you card from a recently retired staff member. A lot of the time I've pulled together a card, gift collection and going-away party at the last minute, which is perfectly okay. Saying thanks is nice, but I don't get upset if it doesn't happen. Leaving me a note with several backhanded compliments is just mean, period. I got along okay with this staff member, I don't think she truly liked me very much, but it stung. Maybe I'm just being oversensitive.

Time to sleep, Keith Olbermann is on!
quidditchgrrl: (PMS emergency)
Er, sorry about my last cryptic posts. I haven't been in the mood to enumerate the various bad things that have happened recently. Add the below to a raging case of PMS, and yeah. Cryptic.

After much ruminating on the year anniversary of Katrina and all of the people still suffering, I have to say to myself: don't get too comfortable with the little inconveniences of life - you know where your family is, and you can go to the space you call home.

Here's the last three months of my life, in a nutshell, cut for the disinterested and for length:

Work )

Taxes )

the car )

Things are looking up at the moment. There's light at the end of the tunnel. )

Thanks to those of you who've heard bits and pieces of these things and offered sympathy and support. It means a lot when you can't go to your family.

I'm so happy to see all of the wonderful things that are happening to people on my flist. New cars, babies, jobs, interviews, decorating, houses. To those of you who are having some angst, you have my sympathy and lots of positive vibes headed your way *eyes [livejournal.com profile] merrydrought and [livejournal.com profile] blue_eye*

Finally, I've been under a small hiatus on news this past week (this is why I've been less responsive lately, [livejournal.com profile] authenticpoppy) - I was getting to the point where I couldn't listen to NPR news without my chin wobbling. The Harry Connick, Jr. single had me flat-out bawling last night, after listening to an interview with a man in NO who is sharing a small trailer with two other men, and who doesn't know where his father, brothers, or 6 year old daughter are. My problems? Not so bad.
quidditchgrrl: (Rawr)
I am consistently amazed at how quickly my husband can suck the happiness out of anything. Grump.
quidditchgrrl: (Eat it - Stephen is so better than ALL o)
Wow. I was in a chat room during the WHCD, and I was THE OLDEST ONE THERE.

I am now outside the age demographic for The Daily Show and Colbert Report. :((

Maybe I should look into purchasing long-term care insurance. Plan to leave a pretty corpse?

I thought Stephen did great. Fuck those elitist Washington insiders. Helen Thomas rocks.

Friending frenzy to ensue from AIM chat. Please feel free to friend me, or not, as the mood strikes you. I automatically friend back, unless you're a known psycho or an unknown quantity.

quidditchgrrl: (*clings*)
So, I've been browsing Myspace.

I found:
My first "real" boyfriend (which made me laugh as he has not aged well, though the cool is still there)
My best friend from high school (which made me cry something fierce and I wish I could call him without his wife going psycho)
Several people I graduated with, one of whom is a lesbian (which makes sense, looking back)
A girl I was in Rainbow with, who has grown from a waif into a stunningly gorgeous woman

It's interesting how many people have Myspaces with nothing blogged on them. What's the point? There must be porn attached to having a Myspace, or something.

Also, spent a couple of hours chatting with [livejournal.com profile] chickadilly, which kept a lot of the tears at bay. I was checking into flights to Tampa today...but I just couldn't bring myself to think about the possibility. I'm just praying that [livejournal.com profile] redblaze keeps her fighting spirit.

Sorry to those of you not used to my angst. It's the distance - Florida is a damn long way away when a friend is seriously ill.

Hugs and love to:
[livejournal.com profile] rachet
[livejournal.com profile] photosenesis
[livejournal.com profile] didi75 (hit the coffee shop, for your own sanity!)
[livejournal.com profile] avidbeader *gentle hugs*
[livejournal.com profile] courtney_beth (hopefully going to TCR helped!)
And anyone else who may be in need...*hugs*
quidditchgrrl: (Facts?  We don't need no stinkin' facts!)
Tom Cruise and Brooke Shields end up with kids born on the same day...let's see whose post-partum depression lasts longest!

If I ever mention needing to hit the grocery, please hit me roughly about the head and shoulders. I have a little hoarding problem )

Am still in a fairly good mood even with the lack of best outcome on the job front. Grocery shopping done, cabinets are full. I'm bored.


Apr. 18th, 2006 09:51 am
quidditchgrrl: (The joy of the public sector *ded*)
Well, I didn't get the job. :(

Got a nice ego boost, however, from their HR person (who used to work in Circ and with whom I'm acquainted), who said he wanted to call me personally to let me know how well I interviewed and what a glowing report I received from the two folks I interviewed with. They didn't go into second interviews, even.

I was "strongly encouraged" to apply for future jobs at CML that I might be interested in. Sadly, the job I interviewed for is the only one I want!

(The reason I'm rather flattered and not crushed is that said HR person is notoriously hard to impress, and is the kind of person who won't give you the time of day unless he thinks you're "someone." To get anything other than a business-as-usual-thanks-for-your-time floored me, to be honest. He was gushing. So, at least I can rest assured that I made a good impression on the people who counted!)

Hopefully he wasn't BSing me. Oh, well. Everything happens for a reason!

Thanks for all the good vibes!
quidditchgrrl: (Books = Ballsy)
I went on a bit of a scouting mission to Main Library yesterday (a little late, but I didn't want to be seen casing the place, as it were). Talked to several staff members, asked general but analytical questions, and took a good hard look at the shelves.

Needless to say, I am now utterly terrified. Collection size: estimated by 2 people to be in the neighborhood of 350 - 400K. Display items are statused, but that doesn't imply where they might be. As far as I know, there are only 10 shelvers (meaning their collection is 30% larger than ours, but they have the same number of people shelving it).

Wow, I never realized how good I have it right now, if the 10-person figure is right. The Center for Discovery alone is big enough to give me palpitations.

I went looking for one of those inspirational-type tchochkes and found a little Buddha. Also bought a magnet that says, of all the long and esoteric quotes one can find, "Everything happens for a reason." *nods* The truth can be simple.

Hope you all had great weeekends!


Feb. 12th, 2006 08:37 pm
quidditchgrrl: (*pout*)
I really hate TurboTax. It's trying to tell me I owe $2100, even after my deductions. AND I already paid my 10% from cashing out my IRA to pay my medical expenses. AND you can't take your student loan interest deduction if you're married filing separately.


This caps the shittiest day I've had for a while. I won't detail aside from saying:

family + pissy Honeybunch + church people + Cracker Barrel/(hair dyeing debacle * poorly thought out trimming) = le SUCK

But hey! It's not snowing! This is a very good thing.

I think I will attempt to cheer myself up by watching TDS/TCR clips and reading some fanfic. *nods*
quidditchgrrl: (That was fun!)
I feel like I'm debasing Michael Hutchence's memory; I actually like the new lead singer for INXS. Their new album isn't half-bad, either.

Concert-going is where I'll draw the line. Might break a hip or something.

Looking around, my house is cleaner than it has been for at LEAST a year, probably 18 months. And it's not even really spotless, just neat and tidy. You could eat out of my refrigerator and use my keyboard with impunity. I even decluttered our upstairs coat closet - Honeybunch was speechless - so our vacuum cleaner would fit.

It's amazing what a little extra time and lack of stress can do for the soul (and the house)! Sometimes I feel like I'm slowly letting out a breath I've been holding for a long time.

Maybe I'll be able to sit down and work for a few hours on A Night In Paris. Writing has been a luxury of late. Or the last two years, give or take.

I'm really in love with the girl they've cast as Luna Lovegood. She's very cute, and very girly. I agree with [livejournal.com profile] heidi8's assertion that Dan should play James...it just fits, doesn't it? The actor cast for Tonks looks good too - she was Marcus' crush in About A Boy.

I dun wanna go bed...
quidditchgrrl: (Angsty Gavin)
To go completely to the other side of happy, random thoughts:

Does the idea of Exxon posting a $11 BILLION dollar profit last quarter make you feel ill? I'm having a hard time containing my disgust for the oligarchy right now, especially after watching the video for "Wake Me Up When September Ends" and fighting tears. Again. (I hate that song, just for that reason.)

I have to echo Honeybunch on his sentiments on The Constant Gardener: I can't say I liked it, but it was a great movie. Gave more vent to that feeling of disgust.

At times I wish I could be oblivious. That way I'd never feel compelled to read the newspaper or online articles, or volunteer to help people who need it. Having said that, reading the Faith and Values section of the Dispatch has given me some new hope for middle-American church values. Take off that WWJD bracelet and start doing it (without complaining, kthx).

Angst brought to you by the letters P, M and S.
quidditchgrrl: (Peace)
How pathetic is it that I bought something for Honeybunch that I don't mind having at all? Tee Hee )

I refuse to feel guilty. So there! :D

Ah, but there is a movie to make one feel guilty (but I totally recommend it): Syriana )

*looks at clock* I was at work 12 hours today *thud* and I have to be back in...about 6 hours. Yay. Night all.


Dec. 12th, 2005 05:21 pm
quidditchgrrl: (Grr!)
I am angry like whoa. It's not going to do me any good to scream and yell at my husband (note that he is IN TROUBLE when I go from Honeybunch to MY HUSBAND).

So, kind reader, I must rant to you )

I know it sounds bitchy, but I, the original shopaholic, can keep myself under budget. If he can't, we're going to have more WORDS.
quidditchgrrl: (That's cool)
Some lyrics! Anyone know this one??

Well, I don't hate my parents
I don't get drunk just to spite them
I've got my own reasons to drink now
Think I'll call my dad up and invite him
I can sleep in 'til noon anytime I want
Though there's not many days that I do
Gotta get up and take on that world
When you're an adult it's no cliche it's the truth


'Cause I'm an adult now
I'm an adult now
I've got the problems of an adult
On my head and on my shoulders
I'm an adult now

I can't even look at young girls anymore
People will think I'm some kind of pervert
Adult sex is either boring or dirty
Young people they can get away with murder
I don't write songs about girls anymore
I have to write songs about women
No more boy meets girl boy loses girl
More like man tries to figure out what the hell went wrong

I can't take any more illicit drugs
I can't afford any artificial joy
I'd sure look like a fool dead in a ditch somewhere
With a mind full of chemicals
Like some cheese-eating high school boy
Sometimes my head hurts and sometimes my stomach hurts
And I guess it won't be long
Till I'm sitting in a room with a bunch
of people whose necks and backs are aching
Whose sight and hearing's failing
Who just can't seem to get it up

Speaking of hearing, I can't take too much loud music
I mean I like to play it, but I sure don't like the racket
Noise, but I can't hear anything
Just guitars screaming, screaming, screaming
Some guy screaming in a leather jacket

quidditchgrrl: (Scorpio after sex)
Not going to HPHP - sticking around to shop and hang with [livejournal.com profile] rlanto. Sephora! :D

Not going to the Columbus line party for GoF - will be in Pittsburgh with [livejournal.com profile] silverbookworm and [livejournal.com profile] zsazsa101. Whee!

I have made a decision regarding my future, and I am so relieved. I'm looking forward to a time when I can see my husband more than a few days a month. Think I'm kidding? The entire month of November will net us a grand total of 1 full day to be together - November 20. Oh, and Thanksgiving too, with his family.

Must sleep. Must sleep. Must sleep. Night.
quidditchgrrl: (World's Smallest Violin)
If you still consider yourself sane after spending four days with 200 teenaged girls, you need to be committed.

I am utterly and completely drained of all rational emotion, and have pretty much spent the last 24 hours crying.  This after doing so well with "emotional filtering".  Bah.

On the way home from Mount Vernon, I saw people gathered around a big chocolate lab that had been hit by a car.  I cried all the way back to Columbus, I just couldn't stand it.  :(

Okay, done with all the negative!

There is something about Bob Mould's voice that makes me happy and feel like I can master the world.  He's getting heavy play tonight, in all of his incarnations.

Now that I'm home, it's time for HBP!  Should I avoid spoilers, or not?  Hmmm...

I think I'm just going to head over to BN on Saturday morning to pick up a copy of the book.  My UK adult version should be here next week.

[livejournal.com profile] hastyent, what are you doing this weekend?  Busy?


quidditchgrrl: (Default)

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