Jan. 25th, 2009

quidditchgrrl: (*brood*)

The past couple of weeks have been a downer for a lot of us, no?

Even the inauguration felt like a short respite from what seems to have been a real soul-sucker of a new year.

I feel guilty for even thinking negatively about my situation, which isn't bad at all, when so many other people are in dire straits or are hurting for more important reasons.

Went out to celebrate a birthday this weekend.  It was great most of the night, but ended up a horrible, morose mess, with all of us crying at some point.  My bestie K is in danger of being deported (she married someone who wasn't actually divorced from his first wife) and she is barely holding on.  I know she's thinking about giving up and going home, and I feel all kinds of horrible and selfish that I can't bring myself to tell her that she has to do the best thing for her mental health, because I want her to be here, with us.

Blah, I hate being in a situation where I do have a voice to make something happen...I just know that what I want to happen isn't necessarily what needs to happen.  Heart broken.

ANYWAY.  It will all turn around, eventually.  As negative as I seem at times, I'm an optimist at heart, pull up the bootstraps, put on the big girl panties, and so on.

I just hope those panties still fit when the time comes.

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quidditchgrrl

May 2009

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